Way Better Than Fingers

A Sci Fi Comedy Podcast


Episode 10


PREVIOUSLY

CONTROL

What the...

JOHN

Uh, guys...

ELSIE

Honestly! Now what?

FRED

I'm seeing it to. Or should I say, not seeing it.

ELSIE

What are you all talking about?

CONTROL

Our interdimensional transporter is... gone.

ELSIE

Gone?

CONTROL

Missing. Absent without leave. Evolved to a higher plane of existence. Call it whatever you want, but it's simply not here.

JOHN

How could our transporter just vanish?

NAVIGATOR

Not vanished. Stolen.

FRED

You mean Jimmy? That's not terribly surprising, I suppose. He did steal the DE that we were trying to steal.

ELSIE

So how are we supposed to...

JOX

(beat)

Lumenautica Cassini. Power down and prepare to be boarded!

JOX'S REVENGE

INT. LIVING ROOM – SPACE

ELSIE

Does anyone have any ideas? Because now would be a really good time for ideas.

FRED

Sadly, I have no news to offer that would fit your desired criteria.

JOHN

What he said, only not as fancy.

NAVIGATOR

I got nothing.

CONTROL

As much as I hate to admit it, I think she's got us this time. Perhaps powering down and doing as she says would be better than finding out what kind of mood our shields are in.

ELSIE

Well I'm not giving up that easily! Open a line to her ship.

NAVIGATOR

Voice link established.

ELSIE

Is this really the best idea you can come up with? Trying to arrest us when you're surrounded by pirates? That's a pretty reckless thing to do even by your standards, Jox.

JOX

(intrusive hailing)

Who said anything about arresting you?

TIMMY

(intrusive hailing, background)

We're not arresting her?

JOX

(intrusive hailing)

Not now, Timmy. I'm working here.

ELSIE

You're not arresting us?

JOX

(intrusive hailing)

That's not my first choice, no.

ELSIE

Then can you turn off that stupid hailing thing and just talk to us? It's really annoying.

NAVIGATOR

She's not arresting us? You're not buying that, are you?

CONTROL

That does seem a bit out of character for her.

ELSIE

We have no engines, no weapons and we're not even sure if our shields have taken the day off or not. I say we hear her out. Now unmute the channel.

CONTROL

Voice communications reestablished. This is a bad idea.

JOX

(normal)

I see your crew still likes to complain.

ELSIE

It's one of the job perks.

NAVIGATOR

I think given our current situation we've actually had a pretty positive attitude about the whole thing.

ELSIE

You know, we're surrounded by hundreds of pirate ships, and I think they're starting to take an interest in you. You may not look like an IGP cruiser, but these guys can smell a cop no matter what dimension she's from. You might not want to drag this out for too long.

JOX

Can't say that I disagree.

ELSIE

So what's the scam, Jox? You've been chasing us across the multiverse and now that we're helpless you're going to let us go, just like that?

JOX

Well, "just like that" isn't quite what I had in mind.

CONTROL

I knew it. I told you she couldn't be trusted.

NAVIGATOR

Actually, I think we should hear her out. She could have vaporized us by now if that's what she wanted.

JOX

For once, your crew is actually making sense.

ELSIE

Okay, so what do you want?

JOX

A truce, so that we can both get what we want.

ELSIE

Well, at the moment I really just want to get out of here in one piece.

JOX

Think about it for a moment. Is that really all that you want? You've been giving me the slip for years, and suddenly you're just sitting here, stranded. How does that happen?

NAVIGATOR

Zinga.

CONTROL

With a G. And a few other letters I could add.

JOX

You got double crossed, didn't you?

ELSIE

Embarrassingly, that seems to be the case. But why would you care?

JOX

Because I got double crossed, too. Zinga and I had a deal. He would lead me to you in return for some help from me. He even gave me a device to track that Ancillian foot fungus treatment so I could locate you.

NAVIGATOR

Don't tell me, let me guess. It wasn't really a radiation tracker at all, it was just something he could use to disable your engines from a distance, right?

JOX

Right. It transmitted some kind of weird virus into the engine operating system. Took those IGP hacks hours to figure it out before they could clean it out and get my engines running.

JOHN

That's starting to sound familiar.

FRED

How far can that thing transmit?

JOX

Obviously far enough to get your ship and the smuggler's, I'd say. So do you want the fix or not?

ELSIE

That depends. What's the catch?

JOX

I help you, you help me.

ELSIE

You want to catch Zinga? Why would you care about him? You're the interdimensional police. He's the IGP's problem.

JOX

He double crossed me. Nobody double crosses me and gets away with it. I don't care who's jurisdiction he's in, I'll take him down if it's the last thing I ever do.

ELSIE

I thought your greatest goal in life was to arrest my crew. I'm not sure if I should be insulted or not. So what, we help you and then after you have Zinga you just turn around and grab us?

JOX

I may be a lot of things, but I don't break a deal. We get Zinga, and then we go our separate ways. There's plenty of time to catch you another day. For now, I think we have a better chance of getting what we want if we work together.

TIMMY

Uh, Jox? Are we really going to work with a pirate crew? Isn't that against regulations?

ELSIE

Aw, he's so sweet. Where did you get this one from?

JOX

The shallow end of the academy, of course.

TIMMY

Hey!

JOX

So what do you think, Cassini? Do we have a deal?

ELSIE

Absolutely.

CONTROL

You're going to trust her to keep her word?

ELSIE

Yes I am. I know everything there is to know about Joxawana Jo, from cutting class as a kid in school to running her own cargo ship all the way up to her building a reputation with the IDP.

CONTROL

Why would you be so well informed about someone who's clearly not your biggest fan?

ELSIE

Know your enemy.

JOX

Not bad, pirate.

ELSIE

Right back at you, copper.

JOX

And your crew is wrong. I'm the biggest fan you have. It'll be a great achievement the day I finally bring you in. And you know I will.

NAVIGATOR

Good luck with that.

ELSIE

So, I assume you have a plan?

JOX

I always have a plan. First, let me transmit this to your crew. It'll show you how to clean the virus. Then we can talk details.

FRED

Information received. Seriously, this is how they cleaned the virus? That's got to be the most bizarre thing I've ever seen.

JOHN

Come spend some time on the ship. You'll get used to bizarre.

FRED ABDUCTED

INT. FRED'S LIVING ROOM – DAY

FRED

Slipper Tech technical support, how may I assist you today? Yes sir, your home automation system does include remote controls. One for each device. Yes sir, I can see how your television set exploding would be a cause for concern, but that's what happens when you use the remote that's meant to control the fusion powered heating element for your hot tub. Have you considered reading the man...

SFX as Zinga and some of his crew transport into Fred's house.

ZINGA

There he is. Grab him!

FRED

Who are you people, and what are you doing in my living room? Hold on...

(beat)

Thank you for calling Slipper Tech, and have a nice day.

(beat)

Now, what are you doing here? Uninvited guests are supposed wait at the front door while I ignore them.

ZINGA

I don't have time for this. Just tell me where it is, or I'll blast your living room and those bunny slippers of yours clear into the next galaxy!

FRED

Wait, I know that voice. Zinga G? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in space boarding someone's cargo ship right now? What are you doing here?

ZINGA

How do you know my voice? Wait, what am I saying? Everyone knows my voice. I'm the greatest pirate in the twelve latitudes! Now tell me where it is before I lose what little patience I have.

FRED

This conversation might be a bit more productive if you told me what it is that you're actually looking for.

ZINGA

Don't play games with me you mindless telephone monkey! Hand over the time machine before I blast you into bits!

FRED

I'm not sure if I should be offended and then laugh at you or the other way around. Is order important?

ZINGA

What are you jabbering about now?

FRED

Well, you asked for a time machine. Leaving aside for the moment my status as a primate with above average communication skills, I think perhaps you're the one who should be examining his level of intellectual comprehension.

ZINGA

Come again?

FRED

There's no such thing as time travel, you ridiculous excuse for a pirate. How can you possibly be so successful at raiding galaxies and still be this staggeringly naïve?

ZINGA

And I suppose there's no such thing as interdimensional travel either, right? Nice try.

FRED

Of course there's interdimensional travel, and a few other things you probably wish you knew about as well. But the only place where time travel exists is in a disreputable corner of this backwater planet known as Hollywood. Time travel is impossible. Everyone knows this. How could you not know this?

ZINGA

Wait, I know that voice. You're part of L.C.'s crew, aren't you? Quit stalling and hand over that time machine!

FRED

Why yes, in fact, I do work for Elsie. How do you think I know about interdimensional travel in the first place? And what makes you think I have a time machine?

ZINGA

I have it on good authority that you Slipper Tech people have been hiding out here on Earth for quite some time developing one.

FRED

Good authority? That's a child's answer! Who told you that we had a time machine? Who?

ZINGA

Well, uh, I...

FRED

Go on, spit it out. Who is it that could tell an intergalactic pirate such nonsense and actually make him believe it. I think we'd like to hire him as a salesman.

ZINGA

You already did.

FRED

Jimmy? Jimmy told you that we had a time machine? And you believed him?

ZINGA

He was very convincing.

FRED

He's a smuggler. Not to mention a home automation salesman. Convincing is what he does. What a sucker. I can't believe you fell for that.

ZINGA

You mean there's no time machine?

FRED

This is my home office. I have a vending machine. I have a coffee machine. I even have a washing machine. But I most certainly do not have a time machine. Now go away. I have work to do.

SFX as Jimmy transports in.

FRED

Jimmy?

ZINGA

Jimmaran?

JIMMERAN

Hey, guys. Sorry to barge in like this, but I need to borrow Fred for a moment.

FRED

I'm not going anywhere with you, you traitor. Hey, what's that you're putting on my arm?

JIMMERAN

Just a transporter band. Good to see you again, Zing. We'll catch up later. Bye, now!

SFX as Jimmy transports out with Fred.

ZINGA

Where did he go? Back to the ship! He can't get far. I'm going to blast that no good, two faced smuggler into five million separate pieces!

JIMMY'S SHIP

INT. JIMMY'S SHIP – SPACE

FRED

Let go of me! Where do you think you're taking me? And why are we on your ship?

JIMMERAN

Relax, Fred. Nothing bad's going to happen. At least now, anyway. You do know that once Zinga figured out there was no time travel machine he was going to vaporize you, right?

FRED

That possibility was in fact at the top of my list of concerns. But I don't see how I'm any better off now. You sold us out to Zinga, and now you've kidnapped me. So what, you're going to ransom me back to Elsie?

JIMMERAN

Something like that. You might want to sit down. This ship may be small, but it's fast enough to melt you into the back wall if you're not properly cushioned.

FRED

Well I'm certainly not enthusiastic about the whole melting thing. How do you operate this seat belt anyway? It looks like it was designed for someone with four arms.

JIMMERAN

Six, actually. Just ignore the other four.

FRED

So where are we going?

JIMMERAN

Where do you think? I know you're Elsie's tech guy, so why don't you make yourself useful and pull up the navigational charts to track our course.

FRED

Tanjaman Bay? You're going back to Tanjaman Bay?

JIMMERAN

That's the general neighborhood, anyway. Once we're there I'll be able to track Elsie's ship.

FRED

Are you going to attack her?

JIMMERAN

You know, for a really smart guy sometimes you're not really smart. Why would I do that? No point in bringing you back for a ransom if there's no one alive to pay the ransom, right?

FRED

Sadly, your logic is unimpeachable. But what if she doesn't pay?

JIMMERAN

Oh, she'll pay. Trust me.

FRED

That last part seems highly unlikely.

THE TRAITOR RETURNS

INT. LIVING ROOM – SPACE

CONTROL

I still think that's the dumbest plan I've ever heard. And I've heard a lot of dumb plans.

NAVIGATOR

Which part, trusting an interdimensional pirate hunter or the part where we hope we can catch a notorious intergalactic pirate off guard long enough to avoid being vaporized?

ELSIE

You two worry too much. I have everything under control.

CONTROL

Isn't that what you said when we boarded that Centurian cargo ship to, and I quote, "just pick up a few things?"

NAVIGATOR

Yeah, I remember that one. No one bothered to tell us about the self-destruct being engaged. Or the part where it was flying straight into a black hole.

ELSIE

You guys complain a lot. We made it out, didn't we?

CONTROL

Only because we don't have bodies. Everything else on that ship was blown to pieces just moments before those pieces were shredded by the gravitational forces of the black hole.

ELSIE

Your point being?

NAVIGATOR

If that mining ship hadn't come so close to us I think we'd still be floating in the middle of space.

ELSIE

I thought it was relaxing.

CONTROL

We need to have a serious conversation about your notions of recreation. Futhermore...

SFX as Jimmy and Fred transport onto the ship.

JOHN

What the... Where did they come from?

NAVIGATOR

And there still aren't any ships showing up on our scopes. Did they just materialize out of thin air?

CONTROL

I can't believe you came back, you traitor. Did you sell out Zinga, too?

NAVIGATOR

I'm not normally one for violence, but in this case I'd be willing to make an exception. John, grab him and we'll dump him into space! See how he likes being on that side of things.

CINDY

You're that smuggler, aren't you? You double crossed us! You were supposed to help us steal that interdimensional thingy but instead you stole the thingy for yourself. Or for that other pirate. Either way that wasn't a very nice thing to do. Bad smuggler!

JOHN

For once I think I agree with every word she said. You screwed us pretty good there, Jimmy. Any reason I shouldn't take you into the kitchen and see what luck we have with the garbage disposal? And what are you doing with Fred?

FRED

Why are you so slow witted. Can't you see that I'm a hostage?

JOHN

Hostage?

ELSIE

Okay, everyone. Let's all just calm down for a moment. Hi, Jimmy. Everything going to plan?

JIMMERAN

For the most part, sure. I thought I was going to have to shoot Fred with a tranquilizer dart, but other than that.

FRED

Plan? You mean I'm not a hostage?

ELSIE

Don't be silly, Fred. Jimmy's part of the crew. Why would he hold you hostage?

CONTROL

And who would be dumb enough to pay ransom for you anyway?

NAVIGATOR

Wait, you mean you knew he was going to sell us out to Zinga?

JIMMERAN

Knew? Who's idea do you think it was in the first place?

ELSIE

It's like you guys said. Zinga's a pirate. Everyone knew he was going to go back on his word and take the DE for himself. So we let him. With a few modifications to his plan that he didn't know about, of course.

JOHN

But I saw you get hauled off by the IGP. How'd you manage to get out of that?

JIMMERAN

I might have made a deal with a certain IGP detective who looked pretty stupid when Zinga got away.

ELSIE

Glad to see you haven't lost your touch.

JIMMERAN

Speaking of which, I couldn't help but notice a certain interdimensional pirate hunter hovering just off to the side of us. And strangely, not attacking. Any stories you'd like to share?

ELSIE

You're not the only one who can make a deal, you know.

JIMMERAN

You cut a deal with Joxawana Jo? Wow. In the smuggler business, I think they'd erect a statue in your honor for pulling off something like that.

ELSIE

Well, in fairness, it was kinda her idea.

JIMMERAN

Jox made a deal with you? That's even harder to believe.

ELSIE

Turns out she had a deal with Zinga to help her catch us.

JIMMERAN

Wait, Zinga double crossed Joxawana Jo? Is he insane? I think the only thing she cares about more than catching us is...

CONTROL

Revenge.

JIMMERAN

Well, this is going to be fun.

ELSIE

So what do you have going on?

JIMMERAN

I told the IGP that Zinga would be at Earth headed for Slipper Tech a couple of hours from now, and that I'd be there to cloak his ships so that he could get the jump on Zinga.

NAVIGATOR

I take it by Fred's presence that things didn't quite go according to plan?

JIMMERAN

They went exactly to plan. I knew precisely when Zing was going to show up, so I came in, grabbed Fred, and left a pretty clear trail for him to follow so that we'd have a good idea where to find him. The fact that I told the IGP it would be a couple of hours later, well, you know...

JOHN

Oh, they're gonna love you.

NO ZINGA

INT. MERCON'S SHIP – SPACE

MERCON

What do you mean there's no other ships here? He was supposed to already be here to cloak us. Are we visible to everyone on Earth?

MERCON CREW

It looks that way, sir.

MERCON

And no sign of Albi's ship? He could be cloaked, you know.

MERCON CREW

If he was here and cloaked, he'd be extending his shields like he promised. I think he just left us here hanging.

MERCON

Well that's just great. No cloak. No Zinga. No nothing.

MERCON CREW

I wouldn't say exactly nothing. Look down at the planet. Are they shooting at us?

MERCON

(sighs)

Yeah, looks that way. Don't worry about it. They're just nuclear missiles. The don't make nearly as much noise as...

MERCON CREW

As the Captain's going to make when we get back to the station?

MERCON

If I ever get my hands on that smuggler...

(beat)

Okay, this is obviously going nowhere. Get us out of here. Jump back to our own galaxy so they'll think we were just another illusion.

MERCON CREW

I always wanted to be a good UFO story.

JOX'S PLAN

INT. JOX'S SHIP – SPACE

TIMMY

So we're really making a deal with a pirate? I thought you hated her.

JOX

Respect, not hate.

TIMMY

They seem like very different things to me.

JOX

Actually there's a very thin line between respect and hate. You've never been married, have you?

TIMMY

Well, there was this one girl...

JOX

And do I even need to tell you to keep your big mouth shut about all of this? They wouldn't just put us in prison, they'd build a brand new prison in our honor. With us buried below the foundation.

TIMMY

Right. Mum's the word. But it's still weird that we'd just let her go. So after we get Zinga, we're going to turn around and grab her, right?

JOX

No, we're not. A deal's a deal. Out here, a reputation can be just as powerful as a good blaster. I gave my word. I don't go back on it. Besides...

TIMMY

Besides, what?

JOX

If we catch her, then we can't chase her anymore. Where's the fun in that?

TIMMY

There's clearly a lot I don't know about being an interdimensional pirate hunter.

JOX

Have you got the tracker recalibrated?

TIMMY

You were right. It really was set to track the radiation from the Ancillian foot fungus treatment. He just added another layer with the virus to disable our engines. Once that was gone, the tracker worked just fine. But I still don't see why we need her help to catch him.

JOX

Just because he's not interdimensional doesn't mean he isn't good at what he does. That Zinga's a crafty one. If we just show up guns blazing and try to shoot it out, maybe we win and maybe we lose. But don't forget, he's got a DE now. We can chase him across dimensions, but that makes it a lot harder than it needs to be. Trust me, this way is easier.

ELSIE'S PLAN

INT. LIVING ROOM – SPACE

CONTROL

I assume from the fact that she didn't start shooting at us that you didn't tell Jox we don't actually have an interdimensional transporter. That's kind of a key part of her plan. Won't she be somewhat annoyed when she finds out that we lied to her?

ELSIE

We didn't lie! Well, you know, not exactly. The transporter belongs to us, so technically we do have one. It's just not, you know, on board the ship.

NAVIGATOR

Yeah, I've been meaning to ask about that. So Jimmy, you stole our transporter, right?

JIMMERAN

Stole? How insulting. I'm a smuggler. Thieves work for an entirely different guild. There are rules in our business, you know.

CONTROL

So you do have our transporter.

JIMMERAN

Of course I do. I did exactly as Elsie said.

JOHN

It was your idea for us to be in the middle of hundreds of ships and not have our main defensive weapon?

ELSIE

The transporter is not a weapon. It's a convenience. And yes, I told Jimmy to take it. He'll bring it back when we're through.

FRED

I'm still not sure what I'm doing here. It sounds like there's going to be shooting. I'm not at all comfortable with shooting.

CINDY

Me, too! I'm with Fred. I think it would be better if we didn't have any shooting. Shooting is bad for you. And for the environment.

JOHN

The environment? We're in space.

FRED

Would you consider an area filled with random gunfire to be a good environment?

JOHN

Uh, no.

FRED

Then I'm inclined to agree with the crazy girl on this one.

ELSIE

The reason you're here is that you're part of my crew, and we leave no one behind. Now that the IGP knows about our Slipper Tech base on Earth, it wouldn't be long before they came for you. No way was I going to let that happen. We take care of our own.

FRED

You mean I'm stuck here?

JOHN

You'd prefer an interdimensional prison?

FRED

Dibs on the front bedroom.

ELSIE

Okay, Navigator, hail Jox.

NAVIGATOR

On it.

JOX

So is everything set on your end, Cassini?

ELSIE

Yep. We're good to go. You ready to find Zinga?

CONTROL

How is she going to find Zinga?

JOX

It turns out the device he gave us really does track the radiation from the Ancillian foot fungus treatment, and he's still got tons of it on his ship.

NAVIGATOR

Seriously? He said we were going to get the entire haul. And he kept half for himself? How is that fair?

CONTROL

Maybe we could focus on the more important implications of that bit of information? Like tracking him down?

NAVIGATOR

Yeah, and we're going to have a lively conversation about the spoils of that raid. He's such a cheater.

JOX

This is what you deal with on a regular basis? I can't believe you get away so often with a crew like this.

ELSIE

Are you kidding? They're the best in the business. Okay guys, got the coordinates? Hit it!

NAVIGATOR

We're outta here.

CATCHING ZINGA

INT. ZINGA'S SHIP – SPACE

ZINGA

L.C.? And that meddlesome Joxawana Jo? How close?

SFX as gunfire rocks his ship.

ZINGA

Oh. That close.

JOX

(intrusive hailing)

Zinga G, you worthless scum, power down and prepare to be boarded! I'll teach you to double cross me!

ZINGA

You seem really upset. I'm a pirate. Did you actually expect me to keep my word? Perhaps you're a little too sensitive to be in this line of work.

(beat)

Fire all weapons now. Blast her out of the sky!

MERCON CREW

With what? Our weapons are gone.

ZINGA

Gone? What do you mean, gone?

MERCON CREW

Along with our engines.

ZINGA

Are you kidding me?

MERCON CREW

And there's a call coming in.

ELSIE

Hey, Zing. How's it going?

ZINGA

Oh, crap...

JIMMY'S GIFT

INT. INTERGALACTIC POLICE STATION - DAY

The background is an indistinct rumble of noise and the occasional people proclaiming their innocence.

IGP OPERATOR

Intergalactic Police, please hold. Intergalactic Police, please hold. Intergalactic... Jimmeran Albi? Are you sure you want to talk to detective Mann? I don't think he's very happy with you right now. Whatever you say. It's your funeral.

(loudly)

Hey, Mercon. There's an escaped smuggler on line two for you.

(back to normal)

Intergalactic Police, please hold...

MERCON

Did she have to broadcast it across the entire police station?

(beat)

Detective Mann. You've got a lot of nerve calling here after the stunt you just pulled, Albi.

JIMMERAN

Hey, Merc. How's it going? No hard feelings, right? After all, I am, well, you know, a smuggler. You should have expected that. You're not getting soft on me, are you?

MERCON

Laugh it up, Albi. The next time we meet won't be so funny.

JIMMERAN

Relax, detective. I actually called to give you a little parting gift. I mean, it's the least I could do after you arrested me and impounded my ship. Say, are there a lot of people in your main parking lot right now? 'Cause you might want to, well, you know, evacuate...

MERCON

You've got to be kidding me!

(loudly)

Trina! Get everyone out of the parking lot now! He's put a bomb there. Everyone out. Now!

IGP OPERATOR

Oh my god! Where's the loudspeaker button on this thing?

(loudspeaker)

Everyone out of the parking lot. Clear the parking lot. Now! Out of the parking lot! Hey! You two! Get off that laser cannon!

(back to normal)

Morons.

SFX as a loud rumble shakes the entire police station.

IGP OPERATOR

Mercon, what was that? It doesn't sound like a bomb to me. Wait. Can you see the parking lot from there? Is that...

MERCON

You've got to be kidding me.

JIMMERAN

Hey, Merc. Still on the line? So, did my present show up in one piece? You might want to have some guys with guns out there. I mean, all the ship's engines and weapons are gone, but you know, pirates will be pirates.

MERCON

You want to tell me how Zinga G's ship is sitting in our main parking lot with no power?

JIMMERAN

Interdimensional transporter. You should really get one of these things. There's lots of fun. Like I said, Merc. No hard feelings.

MERCON

Thanks, Albi. Until next time.

JIMERAN

Gotta run. Bye, now!

GLOATING

INT. ZINGA'S SHIP - DAY

ZINGA

What do you mean there's a call coming in? I don't have time for this! How the hell are we going to get out of here?

ELSIE

Hey, Zing!

NAVIGATOR

Hey, Zing!

CONTROL

Hello, Zinga. Remember us?

JOX

And remember me?

ZINGA

Are you kidding me? No way is that transporter capable of moving an entire ship! How did you pull this off?

ELSIE

Trade secret, Zing. We just wanted to give our regards since we won't see you for another fifteen to twenty years. Have fun!

CONTROL

Don't forget to write.

NAVIGATOR

Enjoy your retirement!

JIMMERAN

Hugs and kisses, Zing!

ELSIE

You know, Jox, you'd make a pretty good pirate.

TIMMY

We're not going to become pirates, are we?

JOX

Let's just see if we still have a job when we get back.

ELSIE

Control, are we ready to go?

CONTROL

All systems online. Where to?

ELSIE

The Central Repository, of course. Or at least that general direction until we can actually find it. Ready, Navigator?

NAVIGATOR

Course laid in.

ELSIE

Hit it!

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